"Nowhere Fast"
(Morrissey/Marr)

These lyrics are transcribed in light blue as they appear in the "Meat Is Murder" album and subsequent compilations and are reproduced here without permission. Variations between the printed lyrics and what is sung by Morrissey are indicated in darker text for additions and omissions are deleted.

I'd like to drop my trousers to the world
I am a man of means (of slender means)
each household appliance
is like a new science in my town
and if the day came when I felt a
natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably jump
in the ocean
and when a train goes by
it's such a sad sound
it's such a sad thing

I'd like to drop my trousers to the Queen
every sensible child will know what this means
the poor and the needy
are selfish and greedy on her terms
and if the day came when I felt a
natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably jump
in the ocean
and when a train goes by
it's such a sad sound
it's such a sad thing

And when I'm lying in my bed
I think about life
and I think about death
and neither one particularly appeals to me
and if the day came when I felt a
natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably lie
in the middle of the street and die
I'd lie down and die